TALK – my first illustration friday submission

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TALK – is the first topic I will try to illustrate for Illustration Friday, in an effort to spend more time drawing in 2017.

I love drawing, I would like to do it more, so why don’t I? 

I dont know why I don’t spend more time drawing, maybe it is connected to somehow feeling guilty. I am currently without a steady job, relying on my unemployment insurance, small odd-jobs, and my boyfriends income, to make a living. I don’t like being dependent on others like that, and when I am, I feel like I am in debt, like I don’t contribute enough. This feeling leads to me feeling that I somehow have to justify everything I do, that everything I do have to be in an effort to get that steady job and income, and that every moment spent on something else is somehow not ok. Like it is somehow not ok for me to spend time on “hobbies” such as drawing and art in general. 
This year I will try to shake that feeling, the feeling of have to be productive constantly, the feeling that drawing is “just a hobby” and not something that can lead to a propper job, the feeling that I have to live my life according to what society tells me is the only correct way to do it, the feeling that if I question status quo it somehow makes me negative. If you never question status quo, nothing will ever change, no progress will ever be made.
I might not succeed, and I might not change the world, but at the very least I will spend more time drawing.